I think I need my medicines fixed again.
Before my provider changed the dosages of my pills, I was pretty clear headed and able to focus. Now, I’m dizzy all of the time, foggy, and unable to focus. I just want to have a normal life–I have to have energy. I know if I go off of my meds, my head will clear and I will be more energetic. Staying on my meds keeps me from being suicidal, though. It’s a rock and a hard place. My weight is pissing me off, too. I’m just all sorts of messed up, I guess.
Last night, Covey basically had to force me to go into the craft room to work on one of my projects that she is helping me with. It felt like a huge chore! Just doing a face-up on a doll felt like it took forever, and it came out…okay. Not my best. Definitely not the worst I’ve ever done, though. Thankfully, the doll looks very good once her wig was on and styled. The outfit looks good, too! I guess I’m just feeling blah about everything.
I don’t know if it’s because I’m kind of ill? My cousin brought her daughter over to my Gram’s a few days ago. She was running a fever of about 102 degrees. My Gram got sick shortly after, as did Covey and me. I’m hoping that it doesn’t spread to my Grandpa, as he’s still healing from his double surgeries (one on his back, and one for his ankle/leg from where his nurses freakin’ dropped him!). Poor Covey’s just as messed up and foggy as I am, so it’s probably just being sick that’s doing it to us.
My binder came in last week. I love it. Covey bought it for me. So far, I’ve only worn it twice, but that’s because I’m in more of a female mindset at the moment. The second I become more masculine, I’ll throw it on and rock the lack-of-breasts look. Added to that, my Gram’s best friend gave us a crap ton of clothing that she was going to donate. A lot of it is super cute and fashionable! Very feminine, of course, but for those days, they will be perfect.
Speaking of clothing, I have to sew some outfits for September (my bjd). I have an idea of what kind of styles she feels comfortable in.
Hmm…now that I’ve been awake for a bit, I feel like sewing. Maybe I’ll make a shirt or something for myself. I certainly have plenty of fabric to do so with. I really like this one style of sweat shirt/tee shirt/top?
So, yes. That’s what I’m going to do today, I believe. Whee!
(Why am I suddenly so hyper?)